Adultery - Coping with it in Church

The questions from the following Holiness.com visitor have to do with adultery in the church she attends. We will only say that she is from the USA, as we don’t want anyone attempting to guess who this visitor is, or the specific church involved.

The Holiness.com visitor wrote:

...I have another question for you
my pastor just found out his wife [has] been having an affair...

he is alway[s] travelling and [rarely] takes her

I am not saying this give[s] her the permission to do what she did

he is feeling hard

the members are taking it very hard for him.

but I think she should also be embrace[d] just as much as he did

I believe she also need our prayer and support also.

As women of the church i feel we should have a time of prayer with her

is that something you think we can do [?]

God is forgiving God

i do no[t] believe we should be pointing fingers i really want to comfort her also.

Could you give me some scriptures to help encourge her

we are one body if one ache all should ache.




HOLINESS.COM RESPONSE:

Dear XXXXX,

If you are saying that the pastor's wife has repented of her sins, then this is a good start to recovery. It sounds like you are saying that the pastor has forgiven her; if so, that is good too. There still may be damage in their relationship(hurt emotions, low trust level, etc.), and they may need marriage counseling. There may be possibly a need for them to look at ways to strengthen their marriage and take steps to guard against the wife being tempted to go back down the road of unfaithfulness.

Given the nature of the sin, it may be advisable that the wife temporarily withdraw from positions of leadership. Is the amount of time that the pastor is spending away from home absolutely necessary?

In any case, it is good for the saints not to fall into the trap of rejoicing in the downfall of the repentant church person; think on the follwing three verses:

Galatians 6:1 Brethren, if a man be overtaken in a fault, ye which are spiritual, restore such an one in the spirit of meekness; considering thyself, lest thou also be tempted.
2 Bear ye one another's burdens, and so fulfil the law of Christ.
3 For if a man think himself to be something, when he is nothing, he deceiveth himself.

You do want to be careful about calling group prayer meetings that are not blessed by your leadership. However, there is value in a repentant person having someone to share their struggles with.
James 5:16 Confess your faults one to another, and pray one for another, that ye may be healed. The effectual fervent prayer of a righteous man availeth much.

Please keep praying for Holiness.com and the work that we do.
And, share our website with everyone

God bless you XXXX...